My Daily Reflection: Change

You know what?
Yes, I have changed.

• I’ve changed because I have been hurt by people who said one thing and did another.
• I’ve changed because my trust was betrayed.
• I’ve changed because I have been lied to and about.
• I’ve changed because I have been bullied and called names.
• I’ve changed because I have learned that people manipulate the truth and gossip and destroy reputations.
• I’ve changed because I have learned that people use other people to get what they want.
• I’ve changed because I have learned that people will say and do anything to win, even when their winning means pain for others.

I’m not as nice as I used to be, because I no longer am willing to get used or be walked over. 

I don’t trust people and tell them my secrets, because behind fake smiles hide those who take advantage and betray.

I distance myself from people because they have to earn my trust before I will allow myself to move closer.

I’ve come to realize I’m the only person I can depend on 100%.  

I am the only one who knows my truth.
I am the only one who can protect myself from the unscrupulous by building a protective wall and boundaries that keep me safe.

Yes trauma does that!

It takes a trusting open person and changes them into a skeptical, cynical, untrusting person wrapped in a security blanket of personal protection.

Renate Dundys Marrello
2017 – 04 – 27

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My Daily Reflections: dealing with difficult times

Quote: 

"Be thankful for the difficult times. During those times, you grow. Be thankful for your limitations, because they give you opportunities for improvement. Be thankful for each new challenge, because it will build your strength and character. Be thankful for your mistakes. They will teach you valuable lessons." ~ Troy Amdahl

Sometimes I don’t like what I have been handed. It seems unfair!

And yet

To really practice gratitude I have to find a way to be grateful even for the adversity.

My moments of greatest transformation occur when I can look within the hurt and find the courage strength and power to change and grow.

• Sometimes this is a struggle!
• Sometimes I rant against the unfairness!
• Sometimes I cry out in anger and anguish; “why me?”

But in facing a situation that is beyond my control, I have found that I regain control when I makes choices about what I will learn, do, become, in the aftermath of that situation.

It is a choice I get to make about how I will move forward, what kind of person will I become after the trauma or tragedy I am facing. It is in the choice that I make that I discover that elusive something that I can be grateful for. Sometimes that elusive something is only the gift of learning something about myself; my strength, my ability to grow or to overcome or to survive.

I am not saying it is easy.

I am not saying it is right that we have to face this situation, or traumatic event that sent us into a spiral out of control.

I am not in any way absolving those who created the negative or traumatic situations nor am I minimizing their culpability in it.

I am simply saying that my power lies in the path I choose after the event, how I shape my now into a path that moves forward, in a new direction, toward new possibilities.

Renate Dundys Marrello

2017 – 04 – 26

Link to my Facebook Reflections Page

My journal blog entries are copyright.

I love when you share my page to spread the word.

If you want to quote me I kindly ask that you please provide a link back to my page. 

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