Thursday, November 12, 2015

healing journey: celebrating the victories

Today I was reminded of some advice I received from a successful person I looked up to, many many years ago. He said "create a victory book.  In it you write all the wonderful things that happen to you, the kind things that people say to you and the moments when you feel appreciated.  These become a visual reminder to you on those days when you feel unsuccessful and unappreciated".

I was very young, when I heard this, life was like this rosy pathway of wonder before me.  I was not even a parent yet at the time.  Looking back now I sort of regret that I did not follow this sage piece of advice in the arrogance of my youth. 

Now, many years later, after the most traumatic event I have ever experienced in my life I wish I had this victory book to look back upon.

Then I realized, that here I am 2 years into my healing journey, and unconsciously I have been following his advice. This is exactly what I have been doing as part of my recovery.  In my daily journal I document those wonderful transactions that happen in my life.  I celebrate the people that treat me with kindness.  I celebrate my victories of self discovery.  I have those moments recorded in my journal!  My journal is a celebration of the victories I have had on my journey of rediscovery and the people that have had an impact on me during those times when I most felt unworthy. 

Today, as I reflect upon this I realize that I felt better about myself just writing about those events, and the writing was significant for it reinforced the good in my life when I was overwhelmed by the sadness and sorrow.   I also now know that I have a record of the people and events during my healing and should I ever need reminding again in the future, they are there for me to revisit. 

I am thinking, that as we move forwards after a traumatic event in our lives, we need to celebrate, commemorate and preserve the special moments when we are recognized and appreciated, or when we overcome an obstacle and surpass our own limited expectations.  These moments are like a salve on a bloody wound, a balm that soothes the acid of hurtful events.  

The act of writing down positive events helps us to refocus on the goodness even in the midst of great loss.  We are given second chances to regain our self-worth, opportunities to be grateful for, and most especially kind compassionate and caring people that remind us that there is goodness in a world where our sorrow makes us believe that all has turned putrid with hatefulness and spite.

I am glad to have these victory moments in my journal to celebrate.  Are you ready to create a victory journal to celebrate your healing journey? 

Renate Dundys Marrello
2015 - 11 - 12 

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